the older I get, the more I understand squidwards anger
internet friends are kinda like illegally downloaded friends. you don’t get the physical copy but you still get all the great content
I’m listening to Cargo Cult and it just feels weird because I keep forgetting I’m friends with this band??
Yeah, I heard the members…
NO SHE ISNT
first date ideas: show your date to everybody in town… wearing a salmon suit
it’s really good to have friends that can cheer you up at anytime. I kinda forgot what that felt like and now I’m gonna go to sleep happy yay
I was extremely kissable today and do you know how many kisses I received??? ZERO
Tiara and Austin learn how funny numbers can be
do you remember when you were a kid and the doorbell rang you would run and see who it was, now i just run to my room instead
"you can’t be just friends with people of the gender you’re attracted to"
myth actually true. i, as a bisexual, can confirm that i have no friends.
pansexuals spend their lives in solitude, with only rocks for company
meanwhile asexuals are friends with everyone. literally every single person on the planet. i do not know how i remember so many names